Girl: Come over
Me: Im an AP student, and I take many AP classes
Girl: My parents arent home
Me: AP stands for advanced placement. These are college level courses that you can take in high school. Typically they are more demanding than regular classes and thus you are often given a higher workload. However, the benefits are far reaching. Consider taking some AP courses during high school for a chance to earn college credit
Nude Portraits series by photographer Trevor Christensen
this is still the funniest thing i’ve ever seen in a yearbook
guys… it’s a palm tree.
if you’re ever really sad you should probably go look at cake wrecks. your life won’t improve or anything but you’ll probably be too busy trying to decide why the word “ultrasound” is suddenly so funny to you to remember why you were sad, at least for a little while
bringing this back because important
"And their crotch turned cold with contempt."
"And in his shame, he became…. Spiderman."
I lost the cap to a soda bottle
Then you’re fucking stupid. If you can’t drink a soda without a cap, then you’re fucking stupid.
LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT. I COULDN’T FIND THE CAP TO AN ALMOST FULL 2 LITER BOTTLE OF DIET COKE. I WASN’T ABOUT TO DRINK THE WHOLE GOD DAMN THING ON THE SPOT. I DONT EVEN LIKE DIET COKE THAT MUCH. IF I PUT IT IN THE FRIDGE IN THE BOTTLE IT WOULD HAVE GONE FLAT SO DONT FUCKING CALL ME STUPID I AM THE FUTURE
my dick is itchy I think i have herpes
so the saddest shortest story is attributed to hemingway:
"For sale: baby shoes, never worn."
and this came to me at breakfast and i thought it was hilarious.
pls don’t ruin hemingway for me.
no i will continue to do that